I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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