He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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