Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
