I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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