omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
So squirting runs in the family.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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