They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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