He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Randomize
