After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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