dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
