hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize