She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
My balls are so social today.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize