I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
