Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
