Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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