For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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