OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize