Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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