There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
