White coat. Heels.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
