This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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