His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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