Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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