I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
