just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
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