with your own penis?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
