The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
