Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
