that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
be right there i have to get my cape
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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