But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
