I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize