this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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