I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm really busy with my period
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