There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
