Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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