need another drink. this is the easiest way
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize