i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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