I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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