Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
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