that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize