i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize