Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
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