I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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