We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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