She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
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