I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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