she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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