The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
