I think I can smell my own vagina right now
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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