oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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