Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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