Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
