I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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